Keep your government hands off my medicare!

The House GOP: America’s Legislative Kidney Stones

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Pity poor John Boehner: all those hours spent in a tanning booth and he still can’t get anyone to believe he’s the Grand Pumpkin! Or an effective Speaker of the House for that matter…

Ol’ Blubberin’ Boehner had an epic fail last night, as his “Plan B” to avoid the Fiscal Cliff was yanked from the House floor for lack of Republican support. Youch. Isn’t the job of a Majority Leader to, umm, lead the majority? You can’t just sit back and wait for that 3rd in line of succession thing to kick in, praying for a nasty bit of food poisoning at a state dinner or something.

Boehner’s plan, which was pretty tepid to begin with, crashed and burned yesterday because Boehner simply has no idea how to corral the lunatic fringe which is now dominating his party. And this isn’t the first time either: remember the Debt Ceiling debacle? Boehner couldn’t get anything done then, either. Seriously, John Boehner can’t pass ANYTHING. He’s so bad at this shit he probably couldn’t pass a blunt in the back of  Rick Ross’ limo.

Of course, Boehner comes off looking like chicken shit precisely because he is trying to win over the Tea Party’s in his caucus, many of whom are so allergic to compromise they break out in hives at the mere mention of raising taxes. Everytime he fails to seek a broader coalition that would ~gasp~ include Democrats, he weakens himself further by once again placing himself at the mercy of Tea Partiers who essentially function like massive kidney stones, making the passage of bills a miserable, painful experience.

I hope you all asked for a parachute for Christmas, because thanks to Boehner and his little Tea Party goblins it looks like we might just be going off that Fiscal Cliff…


Written by Your Benevolent Editor

December 21, 2012 at 12:24 pm

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