E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

George was curious…about vodka

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Oh Florida, have I ever told you how much I love you? Without your swamp-gas induced shenanigans, I might not have anything to blog about.

The AP is reporting that on Thursday night a Florida man was “charged with felony drunken driving and wildlife violations  after police discovered a small monkey in his truck.” If there was one state in the Union where getting a monkey drunk was illegal, it would be Florida, right?

I think it’s safe to say however that because this incident occured in Florida , police deputies were not thrown. Indeed, I’m pretty sure that they stop someone for a suspected DUI in the Sunshine Statethey just ask “Sir, have you been drinking tonight? Also what kind of monkey/flesh-eating lizard/stolen collection of antique sex toys are in this car?”

Basically though it sounds like the suspect is in deep doo-doo. On the other hand, if the career of Florida Governor and Medicare-fraud committing retard Rick Scott says anything, the monkey could be very successful in state politics.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

May 7, 2012 at 9:09 am

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