Keep your government hands off my medicare!

The Grover Norquist Pose

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In a move that will surely turn Park Slope into a Greece-like economic basketcase, the New York Division of Taxation and Finance has decided to tax yoga studios like all other weight loss centers. Dear god! Can ironic mustache taxes be far behind?

Now, normally I would say that taxing impure vices like cigarettes, alcohol and women’s healthcare is a good way to keep people in line; and I’m sure that my old pal Rick Santorum would agree with me when I say that yoga is just Satanism practiced by hot women in form fitting workout gear. However, there are those in the yoga world who seem to think that taxing yoga would destroy this beautiful and terrifically limber practice of the bourgeoisie.

Alison  West, who has the ridiculous job of chief lobbyist for the yoga industry in New York state, argues that “the new tax policy could not have come at a worse time, with the yoga centers just beginning to get back on its feet after the economic downturn”, or  what she calls “the yoga crisis.” People forget that unregulated sun salutation default swaps were what brought down Lehman Brothers.

Well so there you have it folks: not only is yoga the bride of Satan, but the uber-lefties who practice it are more than happy to use the arguments of right-wing anti-tax idealogues when it threatens their downward dogs and chia seed colonics. Whoo! I’d have to do some serious stretching before I managed to contort myself into such a hypocritical stance—I better take up yoga!


Written by Your Benevolent Editor

April 3, 2012 at 11:28 am

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