E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

National Lindsay Lohan Legal Awareness Day

leave a comment »

While the tulips are blooming and trees begin to bud, a seemingly annual yearly rite has come to an end: that’s right folks, today marks the first day in nearly four years that Lindsay Lohan is NOT on probation.

This is a proud day for the once promising actress, who I guess now can do more movies or become a school bus driver. I’m not sure which she is less qualified to do, but either way now that she is not a ward of the state she can do whichever she’d like technically. Of course, the amount of money that our system wasted on punishing this girl rather than say, putting her in intense therapy and putting a restraining order against her crazy enabling mother is a little sickening. If the court forced her to date someone equally insane, like say Mel Gibson, it would have saved the tax payer a lot of money.

Still this is good news all around. Lindsay Lohan can now focus on her professional pursuits, like trying to break the world record of Red Bull and Plan B consumption. Go on wit yo bad self!

Advertisements

Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 30, 2012 at 11:47 am

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: