E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

The 2013 Philip Mai-Anass Humanitarian Award

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I’ve decided that I’m going to endow (teheheh) a prize that awards public officials for making the best double entendre. The winner will get a $69,000 grant to give a deserving hilarious charity of their choice. Perhaps something called the Wang Foundation or the Hairy Clam Seafood Awareness Institute.

This years recipient goes to Massachusetts Senator/Star of gay CSPAN fan fiction Scott Brown. At a St. Patrick’s Day event in Boston this weekend (little known fact: Boston has a small quiet contingent of Irish people), Brown joked about the Republican primary field saying“I see that both Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum now have Secret Service with them on the campaign trail…in Santorum’s case, I think it’s the first time he’s actually ever use protection.” Okay Scott, I may think that you are not fit to represent the great mediocre state of Massachusetts, but that was hilarious. Good for you.

See how much more fun our political speeches would be if we just forced our politicians to down shots of Jameson first?

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 19, 2012 at 11:20 am

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