E PLURIBUS MORON

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The Venus de Limbaugh

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Usually when one hear’s the words “Rush Limbaugh” and “Bust” together in a news story, one assumes it’s either about the Feds arresting the quack “prescribing” him Vicodin or the story has something to do with his voluptuous, Jane Mansfield like bossom. But no! In this case “bust” refers to a controversial statue that has been proposed to honor America’s #1 slut-shamer (take that, every Frat boy!) in his home state of Missouri.

The bust, proposed by Missouri Speaker of the House Steve Tilley, would reside in the Capitol’s Hall of Great Missourians along with Harry Truman, author William S. Burroughs and, oh I don’t know, Starlene Spuckler, inventor of the one bucket meth lab. Critics are furious, saying that in light of Limbaugh’s recently insane Slutgate comments honoring him with a statue would be, in the words of MO Minority Leader Mike Talboy, “seen as a tacit endorsement of his misogynistic attitudes.”

While I agree with Mr. Talboy, I think there is a greater problem here: sure, honoring someone as deeply hateful at Rush Limbaugh is a bad idea, but in a time of reduced spending and state budgets cuts, can the Show Me State really afford the fancy stone needed to properly reproduce Rush’s hideous jowels in sculpture? There just isn’t enough marble in Carrera.

Indeed, I have to imagine there are better uses for state funds. Ya know, like producing a bust of slender handsome Missuori native Scott Bakula. Or that sexy beast and MO native Jon Hamm (now that’s a statue a state could be proud of!).

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 7, 2012 at 3:01 pm

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