E PLURIBUS MORON

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Fixing awful with weird and awful

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Assuming your frontal cortex hasn’t been totally destroyed by seeing Shark Night: 3D this weekend, you’re probably pretty pumped for the fall movie season with all its Oscar contenders! Naturally then it’s time for the Academy to consider new wildly inappropriates hosts for Hollywood’s biggest night.

After James Franco’s smirk and Anne Hathaway’s nerd desperation failed last year, the Academy is rumored to be doubling down by considering actor Eddie Murphy as a host for the 2012 ceremony. Murphy is of course a natural choice as he’s made so many of the Academy’s most honored films such as Meet Dave, The Adventures of Pluto Nash and the Nutty Professor II: Watch Murphy fart in a fatsuit for 93 minutes.

So what are Eddie’s plans to Murphy up the often staid broadcast? Instead of spoofing this year’s nominees he can, ummm, pick up a transvestite hooker? Maybe he could perform a musical number with the members of the Spice Girls that he hasn’t banged. And did someone say touching reunion of the Beverly Hills Cop III cast? The possibilities are as endless as his appetite for cocaine.

I’m just kidding about that: Eddie Murphy will be terrible. Sure he was a great comedian in the 1980s, but he wasn’t exactly network TV friendly. Still, ten points to Academy for trying to fix awful with weird and awful!

UPDATE (3:30)—Oh shit, Deadline Hollywood is reporting that the rumors are true and that Eddie Murphy has accepted. Let the weirdness, and the retailoring of Murphy’s famous red leather suit, begin!

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

September 6, 2011 at 1:36 pm

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