E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

EPM DPRK: A virile leader is a great leader

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Greetings capitalist pigs! As you may recall, the great and sexxxy leadership of the Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea is very excited to contribute to E Pluribus Moron Making fun of Americans (and frostbitten cabbage) is our greatest national export!

We’re following the 2012 Presidential Primary very closely: just for the record, if our Dear Leader Kim Jong Il had participated in the Ames straw poll he would have won that AND American Idol. He’s just that good.

But we read something crazy today about this Primary! New candidate/yankee dog Texas governor Rick Perry had a vasectomy performed by his father in law. What? That’s crazier than having more than 2 hours of electricity a day!

We will never understand Americans. Why would you want your future leader to be impotent? Our Dear Leader is so virile that women beg to sit in his desk chair so as to be blessed with his genetically-superior children (not that that would ever happen, as sitting in Dear Leader’s chair is a capital offense). Indeed, Dear Leader can get a lady knocked up just by performing the song “Use Me” by Bill Withers karaoke.

Let’s hope that if Perry gets elected the Imperialist American army “fire blanks” like their commander in chief (state sponsored laugh)!

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

August 16, 2011 at 11:36 am

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