E PLURIBUS MORON

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It takes so long you get JetBlue balls

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In other California-is-fucked-up news…

This weekend’s closing of the 405 Freeway in Los Angeles has naturally destroyed what small shreds of humanity were left in that town. Up is down. Black is white. Dogs are cats. Kardashians are pedants. It’s craziness is La La Land!

To prove that the city was terribly fucked up this weekend, a group of bloggers decided to test the general state of SoCal transportation by seeing who could get from Burbank to Long Beach first: a group of cyclists or someone on JetBlue’s $4 Burbank-to-Long Beach flight. Surprise! It was the cyclists. And now the press is saying this demonstrates how long and awful plane travel is. Those people are dead wrong.

What’s ridiculous here is that JetBlue offers a flight from Burbank to Long Beach! According to Google Maps that’s like 30 miles. Those people deserve their smog. I mean maybe those of us on the East Coast are just spoiled because we have trains that travel that distance, but it seems to me to be further evidence that if LA fell into the ocean we might not be worse for the wear.

You know you’re society is doomed to fail when coffee costs $5.00 a pop at Starbucks and a flight costs $4.00. Yeesh.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

July 18, 2011 at 4:44 pm

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