E PLURIBUS MORON

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The Church of Latter Day Hilariousness!

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Mitt Romney is exactly as funny as you’d think he’d be. I’m sorry that this is the breaking news I have to present to you this afternoon.

This story broke about a week ago, but it took a little while to sink into our nation’s collective consciousness how weird this whole situation is. You see, as a way to break the ice Mitt Romney pretends that women have just pinched his behind. And it’s not like you can blame the animatronic pistons that propels Romney’s robot legs forward here! He really thinks this is funny!

Obviously the Mormon lifestyle of avoiding cigarettes, dancing and booze can kill the part of the brain that makes jokes. Why do you think Jon Belushi/Chris Farley were so funny and Carrie Nation was such a bore? He is not fit to be President.

So now the question is, would you rather have Romney pretend you grabbed his ass or get a very unsettling backrub from George W. Bush?

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

June 22, 2011 at 4:45 pm

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