E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

A Texas-sized lie gets a Texas-sized punishment

leave a comment »

America, despite being a young nation, is full of Tall Tales: Paul Bunyan, Johnny Appleseed, and of course Trickle Down Economics. But one state legislature has taken up the VERY VERY VERY important cause of regulating these tall tales.

The Texas Legislature has just passed a “bill that would make it a misdemeanor — and in some cases a felony — to misrepresent the size, weight or provenance of a fish in a fishing tournament”. Now wait just a minute, I thought Texas was the Wild West, where the shoot first and ask questions about…professional level fishing weights…later…

Let me begin my judgment here thusly: if lying about the weight of a fish is deamend a misdemeanour, than what about lying about the size of your dick? That’s a slippery constitutional slope (let’s pray it’s not slippery because of fish guts and/or lube)…

Secondly, let me commend Texas, the state with the highest mercury pollution, biggest state budget shortfall and the lowest level of people with a GED , for focusing on this issue instead of other things. I guess as long as they are passing bills about fish and not ones that allow concealed guns on college campuses, the people of that state might be slightly better off.

What’s that? The Texas Senate just passed that handguns on campus bill? Oh. Well, at least we can now protect ourselves from those massive made up fish, right?

Advertisements

Written by Your Benevolent Editor

May 12, 2011 at 5:02 pm

Posted in Governors and States

Tagged with , ,

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: