Be-chinoed rappers take over White House Poetry Slam
Wanna know how I know you (the GOP) are white? You’re afraid of Common.
Yes, conservative groups are in an uproar because the rapper Common, who is usually mentioned in the same breath as other popular White Boy College rappers Talib Kweli and Lupe Fiasco, is coming to a Poetry Reading at the White House. Ya see, the right-wing blogosphere is upset because Common (whose real first name is Lonnie ~cough~ nerd ~cough~) once rapped he wanted to “burn” then President Bush. As you may remember from his rap feud with Jadakiss, President Bush did not take kindly to diss tracks and I guess neither do his fans.
However, even a cursory glance at Common shows how retarded being afraid of this mediocre rapper is. He was featured in a Christmas ad campaign for the Gap for goodness sake! Unless he belongs to a gang whose colors are pastel and argyle patterned, his rhymes are as dangerous as, say, Elmo’s when he raps about brushing your teeth.
Now can we please get back to the important White House Hip Hop connection? Ya know, where Michelle Obama teaches us how to Dougie??