Keep your government hands off my medicare!

Single Mothers: America’s Greatest Monsters

with one comment


Now that the Wisconsin government has made their unethical and illegal vote attacking such loathesome public workers a pre-school teachers, it’s time to righteously attack another disgusting demographic: single mothers. Yuck!

First, aspiring Republican president hopeful Mike Huckabee started a firestorm when he chastised Natalie Portmann for getting pregnant before she got married; that’s bizarre because if you really wanted to call her out, how about just mentioning Star Wars: The Phantom Menace?

Conservative columnist Andrea Peyser today supported Huckabee, saying that when “Hollywood speaks…Trailer parks listen“and that high-profile single mothers encourage skanks across the nation to get a baby in their belly. That’s fucking insulting to poor people and just really retarded.

Wanna know how I can prove that this assertion isn’t true? While the media constantly bombards us with pictures of Auschwitz skinny celebrities (relax I’m Jewish I can use that adjective), we live in the fattest society in history, and when people do lose weight they do it for themselves, not for Courtney Cox’s protruding collar bone. Thus, while we are also bombarded with celebrity baby news, our high fertility rates have as little to do with Kate Hudson’s womb as our waistlines have to do with a starlet conspicuously eating a giant hamburger.

So let’s all try to remember that while basing your career on having a child named “Apple” or “Bronx Mowgli” is pretty stupid, the assertion that women are dumb enough to pop out kids because celebrities are doing it is even more ridiculous and should be treated as such.


Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 10, 2011 at 12:35 pm

One Response

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  1. You know what trailer parks DO listen to? As well as teen moms across the nation? The stupid ignorant antiquated abstinence only education. Not telling people about things like condoms and birth control and PLANNED PARENTHOOD is a lot more effective at getting young women all knocked up then Natalie Portman and her bun in the oven. Just like those young people aren’t running to Swan Lake, they aren’t housing aliens in their wombs because she tells them to.


    March 10, 2011 at 3:22 pm

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