E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

This Mad Men nostalgia is really getting out of control

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Thank god unions and trains are back in the news, because now those institutions use industrial sounding americana to sound cool like “Union Market” and “Standard Cloth” are no longer religated to the land of silly hipster bullshit (Brooklyn).

With their landslide victory in November, many Republican governors came into office claiming a mandate to reduce state spending to the size of part of Charlie Sheen’s brain that controls his impulse (read: small). Indeed, Florida governor Rick Scott recently turned down all federal funds to build a high speed rail line in the Sunshine State just as Wisconsin governor Scott Walker, under the guise of spending cuts and pension reform, has been trying to push through a law to strip most Wisconsin state workers of the right to collectively bargain.

These pre-emptive strikes against government spending seem to have a lot in common with the G.O.P.’s once-loved doctrine of pre-emptive military strikes: both were/are based on deeply flawed assumptions (i.e. that Saddam had WMDs and that government spending and increased taxation/regulation during a recession is always a bad thing) and both were/will be immensely deleterious.

In fact, I dare say that taking away collective bargaining and turning down free billions for long over due infrastructure projects is like cutting off your families feet to avoid receiving ugly socks as a Christmas present. While you may solve one small problem you’ve royally (stump) fucked yourself in SO many other ways.

And while this piece does criticize the remarkable stupidity and ignorance of the anti-anything government related Right, I want to caution although handlebar mustache wearing pie makers out there NOT to use this industrial sounding news as an excuse to wear suspenders, a leather apron, or name a child “Adeline”.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

February 18, 2011 at 12:13 pm

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