E PLURIBUS MORON

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Party in the Ah! Ah! Ah! Make it stop!

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What did you get for your 18th birthday? A computer? A car? Because when celebrities become legal they actually give our nation the wonderful gift of compromising photos. God bless you, Disney Whores.

The latest of these genetically perfect mutants to turn the big 1-8 is Miley Cyrus. ‘Cause she’s always so classy, a video has just leaked of Miley doing bong rips. Quel scandale!

Cyrus’ people, for their part, have insisted she isn’t smoking weed, but rather the legal herb Salvia. Oh it’s only Salvia….wait, WHAT? Salvia the drug that causes insane hallucinations and is only legal because it the government hasn’t gotten around to making it illegal yet? That salvia?

I guess the powers the be in Hollywood really are that dumb, huh? I mean had she smoked marijuana, which is illegal but pretty harmless, she’d lose all kinds of endorsements and have to tearfully apologize. But because she’s smoking salvia, a terrifying drug that is inexplicably legal, she’s in the clear!

This my friends is why I stick to good old fashioned meth.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

December 10, 2010 at 12:22 pm

Posted in Show Business

Tagged with , ,

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