E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

Juan Fewer Conservative (hardy-har-har-NPR)

with one comment

Imagine yourself as the average N.P.R. executive: it’s 8 o’clock and you and disabled lesbian partner sit down with your three adopted kids to a feast of Bethesda’s finest fregan Thai food when you get a frantic call that one of your employees has gone rogue.

No, Ari Shapiro hasn’t gone all John Hinckley Jr., but your only black correspondent who’s never done commentary on his hair, Juan Williams, has. Juan, who has been getting increasingly conservative over the years, appeared last night on The O’Reilly Factor and said “when I get on the plane…if I see people who are in Muslim garb…I get worried. I get nervous.” What?!? I spit out my kale too when I heard that.

N.P.R. reacted to this by firing Williams, who they had asked before to tone down his conservative rhetoric. I say if he’s dumb enough to keep going on O’Reilly and playing second fiddle in a symphony of ignorance, then fuck him, right? I mean he’s entitled to his opinion but that doesn’t mean he entitled to keep his job if he expresses it.

I mean my grandmother felt just as nervous about black guys like Williams on airplanes, but it doesn’t make it right. Nor does it make his opinion right: if I was a Muslim terrorist who wanted to blow up a plane I wouldn’t wear a turban, I’d wear a Christmas sweater. Or even better put the bomb in an N.P.R tote bag. No one would suspect that…

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

October 21, 2010 at 3:00 pm

Posted in The Media

Tagged with , , , , ,

One Response

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  1. I hear once the Tea Party takes over Fox News will replace NPR as publicly funded broadcasting and Ira Glass will be forced to serve as Juan William’s fluffer before every show.

    Asher Levinthal

    October 21, 2010 at 3:12 pm


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