E PLURIBUS MORON

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The Transitive Properties of Christine O’Donnell

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Christine O’Donnell, a.k.a Palin Lite, a.k.a Chris O’Donnell of Batman fame’s new transgendered persona, has finally released her first campaign ad! Now living in the Delaware media market (jealous?) I have yet to see this ad on TV, which means she probs doesn’t have any money. But hey, why should that stop us from celebrating her uniquely American idiocy on the Internet? Check it out:

Looks like this ad was timed for Halloween! As you know, a clip of O’Donnell admitting that she dabbled in witchcraft was all the rage recently, and I think it’s safe to say that if you have to put out a campaign ad reassuring the voter that you aren’t the bride of Satan, the issue may have gotten away from you. Womp womp.

Also let’s examine the main proposition of this ad: that Christine O’Donnell is you and understands your pain and frustration. But there’s a catch! If Christine O’Donnell is John Doe, and she’s also John Doe’s wife Jane, then when Jon and Jane have holy marital sex isn’t that Christine O’Donnell having sex with herself, and thus masturbating?!?!? This woman ran for Senate on her experience in telling people not to touch themselves, and now she goes back on that!

Typical politicians. They can’t even masturbate right.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

October 6, 2010 at 3:02 pm

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