E PLURIBUS MORON

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Mouse Brains in the Heads of Human Candidates

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While I was under the impression that there was nothing worth visiting in Delaware, according to their new Republican nominee for Senate Christine O’Donnell, it’s the home of the Island of Dr. Moreau. I’m guessing for tax purposes.

As you know, the Island of Dr. Moreau is a novel about an evil doctor who engineers human-animal hybrids. As you also know, Christine O’Donnell is like Sarah Palin without a functioning frontal cortex. Apparently in 2007 while appearing on The O’Reilly Factor, O’Donnell decried “American scientific companies” which “are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains”. Well at least someone in this story has a functioning human brain.

Now to be fair many Republicans over the years have had a very grounded fear what George W. Bush once called “human-animal hybrids”. Now the fact that scientists have grown human brain cells in a mouse, but not a fully functioning human brain, shouldn’t stop a plucky young candidate like O’Donnell. Ask any Tea Bagger and they’ll tell you cats with human brains cause our high deficits and that Obama is secretly half horse.

This story would be sad and ridiculously stupid if I thought she had a shot of winning, but O’Donnell is as dead as Dover’s night life scene. But maybe as a nice consolation prize we could get her a super intelligent mouse!

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

September 18, 2010 at 4:02 pm

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