Keep your government hands off my medicare!

You want hippo fat fries with that?

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And you thought the White House was the only place where a major cat fight was going on…

Diners in (you guessed it) Arizona (pause for perfunctory groan) now have the chance to get a nice juicy Lion meat hamburger at the Phoenix area restaurant Il Vinaio. The lion hamburger is meant to be a celebration of the South Africa as it hosts the world cup, and for just $21 you get the burger, spicy french fries, corn on the cob, and a nice cool glass of ebola soda. The restaurant’s owners have received hate mail and a bomb threat, which isn’t surprising because those goddamn environmentalists don’t realize that if lions could make hamburgers out of human meat they most certainly would.

But it’s the rest of this story doesn’t make any logical sense to me. First of all, what kind of a person opens a lion meat farm in Illinois? What were they like a super-villain or the manager of the Roman Colloseum who decided organic farming was more their style? It’s really a shame no one offered Rod Blagojovich a ton of lion meat in return for Obama’s senate seat…

More importantly I think, is the fact that Arizona needs to be expelled from the Union. What kind of state throws out all it’s Mexicans (who make delicious food) but then fills the state with lions (who I’m guessing don’t)? Perhaps this state needs to learn the difference between good things that are not from the majority culture, like extending full civil rights to Latinos even though they’re not white, and bad things that are not from the majority culture, like lion sandwiches.


Written by Your Benevolent Editor

June 23, 2010 at 11:26 am

One Response

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  1. […] wait, this sounds familiar. Didn’t I just blog about a restaurant in Phoenix serving lion burgers for the World Cup? What about living in 110 degree heat just makes you want to hurt the more majestic creatures on […]

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