E PLURIBUS MORON

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The Leaning Tower of Gaga

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Like the Collosus of Rhodes or the Sex and the City movies, all things eventually end in a fiery hellish implosion of doom; today, this inevitable scenario happened to Lady Gaga and her wacky clothing. Check out the pictures below from her slip up at Heathrow airport:

Now you know I loves me some Lady Gaga, although clearly not as much as this guy, and I am pleading with you to pay attention to her! “Pay more attention to her?” you ask “She’s like a hyper-Madonna in the age of Twitter! How much more attention could she need need?”. Well it’s a lot, dagnabit. We all know that Lady Gaga is an alien who doesn’t feed off of food and water, but rather off of attention, thus creating crazy stilts accidents.

Now I’d like all the men in the audience to take a knee: I want the few remaining ones of you who pretend you don’t like Lady Gaga to stop it. It’s just more ignorant jingoistic bravado to cover up how much you love Bad Romance. When I go to parties and dudes role their eyes when people play her music, you’re encourgaging her not to write her fun pop-music, but instead to bust her head open on stilts, wear used tampon dresses, and focus the killing skills of her cadre of gay ninja assassins.

America has enough problems right now, okay? Lady Gaga and Gucci Mane’s release from prison are the only things we have going for us now musically (sign J. Biebs, why must you be Canadian?), so fellas, man up, admit you like her or else you might just get crashed into by Leaning Tower of Gaga.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

June 23, 2010 at 3:54 pm

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