E PLURIBUS MORON

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Jonas Brothers vs. Benjamin Netanyahu

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As the Middle East once again dissolves into chaos, in typical un-American fashion the Obama Administration has chosen to meet with a clan of religious zealots rather than the elected Prime Minister of Israel. Okay so maybe that group of religious fanatics is just the uber-Catholic Jonas Brothers, but am I the only one who is worried that while Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has never had visited the White House for direct talks, the Jonas Brothers have been there on five seperate occasions? I smell a rat. A dreamy dreamy rat.

This all started when the White House recently announced that the Jonas Brothers would be performing to honor Paul McCartney, who is receiving the Library of Congress’ Gershwin Prize for Popular Music. Wait a minute, America is in a recession and we’re giving this prize to a FOREIGNER??? There have to be more deserving American pop stars. What about, say, Mandy Moore? Sheila E? Ike Turner’s ghost?

But let’s get back to the question at hand: will the White House keep pandering to Sasha, Malia and the rest of the 12 year old girl/closeted 12 year old boy vote? How many times can Obama meet with his daughters’ JB (The Jonas Brothers) and not his JB (Joe Biden) without losing credibility on the international stage?

There is only one solution to this ridiculous situation: get the Obama girls interested in Mid-East diplomacy; Obama will instantly achieving lasting peace in the Holy Hland when Tiger Beat starts publishing posters of Recep Erdogan, Hamad Bin Khalifi Al-Thani, Masoud Edrisi, and instead of Nick, Joe, and the Ugly One.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

June 2, 2010 at 10:08 am

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