E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

Sarah Palin is a shape shifter

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If the popularity of those damn Twilight movies wasn’t evident enough, it appears as though Sarah Palin has turned her back on her BFF God and become a shape shifting vampire. All the signs point to it–a public thirst for blood (hunting wolves from helicopters), minions of undead followers (Tea Party Grandmas) and those black bondage boots should have tipped us off long ago.

Palin was in Washington today speaking at the Susan B. Anthony List Annual Breakfast to raise money for conservative female candidates (The Susan B. Anthony List motto? “Women empowering women to oppress themselves). Palin called for anti-choice women to be assertive about their beliefs saying “The mama grizzlies, they rise up…You thought pit bulls are tough. You don’t want to mess with the mama grizzlies. And I think there are a whole lot of those in this room.”

That’s right: Sarah Palin’s vampire heart allows her to transform into pit bulls in lipstick, mama grizzlies, and any number of animals with reading levels equal to her own. I know what you’re thinking: if she can shape shift into a vicious animal, surely she will soon shape shift into a credible national candidate! Never fear folks: Satan himself doesn’t hate mortals enough to allow that to happen.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

May 14, 2010 at 12:39 pm

One Response

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  1. […] Remember a few months ago when Sarah Palin called herself “a mama grizzley” and I called her a shape shifter? Well her political action committee NAMBLA SarahPAC has released a new ad showing this, her most […]


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