E PLURIBUS MORON

Keep your government hands off my medicare!

We shall overcome someday

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In this, the fourth week of March 2010, a group of tyrannical money grubbing elites was brought to their knees by common sense. What? I’m not talking about the health insurance companies! No, I’m talking about the glorious announcement today that MTV’s The Hills has been cancelled! I truly feel that this decision will restore our country back to its rightful position as the leader among the nations.

Now I know this doesn’t technically count as idiocy in the news, if anything this is a smart and extremely over due move, but to be fair the fact that The Hills was able to run six seasons is so ineffably stupid that I think it deserves special mention. The show, a spin off of Laguna Beach which was in itself a reality show version of The O.C which was a reboot of 90210 was so freaking meta and removed any source of genuine artistic material that for decades people are going to be writing crappy Media Studies theses about it. You’re welcome Skidmore College class of 2035!

Think about the bright shining future: Hiedi and Spencer, who have moved from the B to the D list of celebrities, will turn to dust as they are only sustained by the presence of cameras. Brody Jenner will end up where he belongs: in gay snuff films. Even Audrina Patridge, the least interesting celebrity on the planet, will be relocated to her native environment- on the ocean floor peering up at passing shrimp to eat.

To paraphrase Martin Luther King “Let us realize that the arc of the (reality show) universe is long but it bends towards justice.”

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 25, 2010 at 2:09 pm

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