E PLURIBUS MORON

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A tea sandwich of stupid TV

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All this week, the cast of my beloved “Jersey Shore” will be re-enacting the Academy Awards’ 10 best picture nominees for the “Lopez Tonight” show. Such an event, I think, can be considered a stupid tea sandwich with a creamy cinematic center.

I will defend “The Jersey Shore” to my death as a paragon of brilliantly idiotic reality TV programming. Indeed, the Jersey Shore is kind of the fine foccacia of the unquestionably stupid Television world- addictive, chewy, and overwhelmingly Italian.

George Lopez, on the other hand, is awful. His show’s fake party atmosphere and plethora of B and C list celebrities (“put your hands together for Billy Ray Cyrus and Kourtney Kardashian!”) makes it the deep fried Chinese made tortilla shell of comedy. Lame, tasteless, and artificial: basically, the kind of thing  that to stomach requires a huge quantity of alcohol.

Here are the clips of this tea sandwich of stupidity. It’s clearly a tea sandwich because no crusty nugget of humor made it into these clips’ final draft. This whole thing proves once again that the cast of “the Jersey Shore” is best when they’re vomiting on the beach and talking about nailing chicks that are on their periods- not doing something gross like appearing on a show with George Lopez.

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Written by Your Benevolent Editor

March 2, 2010 at 7:05 pm

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